weibo.com/shenkuantipang >> Come to the dark side <<
== Subs and Sync by lorez ==
- Hello? - Hello.
- Uh, yes? - Who is this?
- Who are you calling? - Who am I speaking to?
- Wrong number. - Who was that?
- Oh, nobody. - Did you pick a movie?
- Yeah, we re gonna go scary: Saw IV. - Oh, I saw that in theaters. It sucks.
It's not scary, it's gross. I hate all that torture porn shit.
Why, angry feel.
- Well, I like Jigsaw. I think he kills people very creatively. - But she don't give a shit who dies...
...cos there's no character to fill a man. It's just body parts whipping and blood spewing.
- Who you keep texting? - I have a Facebook stalker. He keeps leaving me messages.
- Nah, like what? - Just stuff like: Hey, what's up? You are hot. I want to kill you...
- Well, delete him. - I did it, but he hacked its way back in.
- Or report him. - He is really hot, tho. You wanna see?
- That's Channing Tatum. - It is not. Is it?
Yeah, from his Abercrombie days. You were being punk'd.
- Hello? - Who is this?
The more impatient version of the person you just spoke to.
I am sorry. You don't have to be a bitch about it. - Of course I don't. Eat me.
- You hang up on me and I cut thru your neck until I feel bone! - Who is it?
It's for you.
- Hello? - Who is this?
- It's Trudie. Who's this? - This is the last person you ever gonna see alive.
- It's a prank. Hang up. - Why did you give the phone to me?
- You are the one with a stalker. - Are the doors locked?
Don't freak out.
Let it ring.
It's from stalker boy. He said "Answer the phone".
For God's sake, it's a joke Trudie. It's probably Lexie or Karen.
- Where are you going? - To make sure the front door is locked.
- No, don't open it. - You're overreacting.
It's a joke, Trudie, ok? Someone made a dummy profile. They re just trying to scare you.
Wait. Who is it?
I said, who is it? Let's call the cops.
"I dare you to open the door." No, Sherri, don't. No, don't, I'm scared.
It could be anyone that we know. Lisa, Bailey, Wayne.
Or the hoped-for long shot, Channing Tatum.
There is nobody out here.
What is it say?
It says "I'm not outside, I am right beside you. "
Trudie!
- Fucking kidding me? - What?
That was so fucking stupid. Pure horse shit. The death of horror right here in front of us!
- I jumped. It scared me. - A fucking Facebook killer? You re kidding me right?
I guess now it would be Twitter. That'd make more sense.
Under articulate teens sit around and deconstruct horror movies until Ghostface kills them one by one.
It's been done to death. The whole self-aware post-modern meta-shit.
Stick a fork in 1996 already.
I like the Stab movies. They are scarier.
It's not aliens or zombies or little Asian ghost girls.
There is something real about a guy with a knife who just ... snaps.
- It can really happen. - I can't do it. These people don't know when to stop.
They just keep recycling the same shit.
Even the opening scene, there is always some random girl who gets a call that undoubtedly ends up getting her killed.
It's all so predictable. There's no element of surprise.
You can see everything coming.
Did that surprise you?
- Why? - Because you talk too much.
Now shut the fuck up and watch the movie.
Oh my God. I love it.
I've seen it five times, and it still gets me every time.
- You re kidding? I don't get it. - Ok, it's like the Twilight Zone.
- Twilight zone... - A movie within a movie.
I get that. But it's illogical..
It begs the question that if the beginning of Stab 7 is Stab 6 then it's the beginning of Stab 6 Stab 5?
And if so, what is Stab 4 about?
- You re over thinking it.- Am I or did you ever make it, just under think it, there's a reason i don't watch these movies?
I can't believe you haven't seen them. We live in Woodsboro.
It has nothing to do with Woodsboro. I thought you said Stab was based on true stories.
The first three, the original trilogy is based off of Sidney Prescott.
But then she threatened to sue em if they used the true story so they just started making stuff up.
Stab 5 has time travel, which is by far the worst.
- And don't you have enough about this story every year? - At least Woodsboro is known for something.
Did you hear that?
Uh, no, I didn't hear anything.
I did.
Jenny, don't try to scare me.
I am not trying to scare you.
You do it all the time.
No, I don't.
Where are you going?
I told you, I heard something.
I know you re trying to scare me.
I am not.
What is it?
I must have left the window in my room open.
- Could you get that? Marnie? - Yeah.
- Hello? - Hello. Who is this?
Marnie. Who is this?
This is the last person you ever gonna see alive.
What?
- I am sorry. I had to. - You bitch!
- So not funny. - Somebody falls for it every year.
- I don't see why you get off on this shi..... - Marnie?
Marnie? Marnie?!?
Good one, Marnie. Lights out, phone on the floor.
You know, you really should direct horror films.
Wherever you are...
Lemme guess. You want me to walk by an open door frame so you can pop out, huh?
Ok. Timing, timing is perfect. But you don't have the app on your phone, so you can't talk like Ghostface.
- Can you? - Yes, I can.
- Who is this? - Not an app.
- Is this Trevor? - Do I sound like a Trevor to you?
Think of me as your director. You re in my movie. You got a fun part so don't blow it.
- What movie? - Same one Marnie's in, only her part got cut way back.
But you, you re dumb blond with the big tits. We'll have some fun with you before you die.
I have a 4.0 GPA (Grade Point Average) and 135 IQ asshole. What did you do with Marnie?
- She's on the cutting room floor. -That's not funny.
This isn't a comedy, it's a horror film. People live, people die.
And you'd better start running.
Marnie?
- What do you think? - Well, I guess today's the anniversary.
- Kids... - No, I meant the display.
- It's good. - Told the owner I'd kill his cat if you didn't get a ring.
Nice...
- Woah, 25 to stay alive! - Shit! Sorry Sheriff!
Kirby...
Ehi, before you get in the car, you have to promise not to kill me.
Why? What did you do?
Trevor called me last night.
Why is he calling you?
Because you won't take his calls, he knows I have your ear and he wants to know.
- Know what? - How upset you are.
- Can we just not talk about this? - Fine, fine.
So, Trevor called me last night.
He called you too?
He's afraid your cousin coming to Woodsboro is distracting you from knowing how sorry he really is.
- Well, that's inventive. - God...
Oh, by the way, have you seen the Grim Reaper? Angel of Death?
What are you talking about?
Your cousin. Last stop in a book tour, first stop in a road to a new life.
It's very dramatic. She's the reason why I love horror movies.
I'm sure she'd love to hear that. If I knew her which, I don't really.
Well, wherever she went, peple died. Other people. It was never her.
I mean, Stab is the wrong franchise for her, it should be Final Destination.
- And why is Jenny Randall calling me?
- I cannot stand Jenny Randall... - Hello?
- Oh, Jill... - Why?
- Shh...Jenny, is this you?
What's your favorite scary movie?
- Ok, who is this? - What does she want?
- I said, who is this? - I asked you a question.
What's your favorite scary movie?
I'm hanging up.
Wow, that was original.
I got a call like that this morning from Marnie the Carnie.
- What? - Watch out!
- Nice proof asshole! - Ok...
- You should really stop at sign. - Sorry...
Angel of Death.
- Mayor wants these down before lunch. - Only 25 more to go.
- Morning Sheriff. - Morning Deputy. Joe.
Morning Sheriff.
- Looks like the celebration's begun. - High School kids probably.
Yeah. One generation's tragedy is the next one's joke.
Sorry you can never get away from this.
You know, I wish I had been old enough to be part of the Forest when you were solving those crimes.
It's those intense investigations that really bond relationships.
- Yeah. - How's Gale by the way?
Gale's good. She's writing...fiction.
Hey I made some lemon squares, they're in my car.
Thanks Deputy, but no, thanks.
Sheriff, you're not cheating on your wife if you eat my lemon square.
Yeah, but I would be cheating on the diet.
Sheriff Riley! Come in! Sheriff Riley!
This is Sheriff Riley, go ahead.
You gotta get over to the Randall house right away. It's bad Sheriff, real bad.
The book is "Out of Darkness" and its author Sidney Prescott is here with us today.
Have the 7 Stab movies all based on Gale Weathers' books about you made it even harder to go on?
I don't blame Gale, that's in the past. Now if I was a victim for too long, it was up to me to reinvent myself.
- That's why I wrote this book. - Sidney Prescott, everybody. And rave reviews for her book, "Out of Darkness".
Allright Gale, let's do it. Let's reinvent myself.
Except, I have no fucking idea what to write!
- How's that new? - That's the 2.0 upgrade version. I am totally mobile, man.
Nice.
Ouh, this is Hall Pass with Robbie Mercer, here with the luscious Olivia "Don't look at my tits, I have a mind" Morris.
Here is my Woodsboro masquerade anniversary question: What is your favorite scary movie?
Is that all you got? Some stupid douche question?
Yeah, where did you hear that anyway?
It's a line from Stab 1. Hey Charlie.
- You re a genre nut Kirby, what's your favorite scary movie? - Bambi.
- Dork. - What?
That's...funny, Kirby.
- Completely unaware you exist. - No, man, she wants me.
Yeah, I wish, right? Asshole.
- I think Charlie likes you. - And I like him. To tease, to torment, to make him squirm.
You could do a lot worse, trust me.
Oh, hi Trevor. Bye Trevor.
Can we talk? Somebody cares about you over here you know?
Someone who made you really happy once.
Someone who never should have let you go.
When you re done with a phone call, you let someone go...
When you take someone to the airport, you let them go...
When you tell someone you love her, and she gives you everything, and then you go out with someone else...
that is not letting her go, that is dumping her. Ok? That's betrayal.
Trevor Sheldon denied live on Hall Pass with Robbie Mercer. What is your favorite scary movie, man?
I'll show you.
Now I began to believe myself that that was all I was, a victim. And that was unacceptable to me...
So, I sat down and began to write a new role that would be my own.
A role for a woman who could leave the walls of fear behind and step out into the sunlight.
Out of Darkness.
- Thank you. - Ok, we re gonna start the book signing in a sec, so buy your copies while they last.
- May you ladies. - New York Times best seller. Rave reviews...
- Gale...I am glad you came. - Congratulations, Sidney.
- I haven't had a chance to read it yet, but... - Well, you can get one.
- Dewey! Ehi! - Hey, Sidney. Gale, you made it.
What's going on Dewey?
Hey, Sid, I am sorry. I gotta do something...I am really sorry.
Excuse me. This will only take a minute. I need you all to stay where you are and remain silent.
Nobody leaves, you heard the Sheriff, thanks you.
- Can't this wait 45, I am running an event here. - M'am this is a police event now.
- What's going on? - Gale, this is police business. If you could just let us handle this.
I am talking to my husband, Deputy Judy.
Listen. There's a phone we believe may have been taken from the scene of a crime.
Deputy Hicks has traced its location back to these coordinates.
- The rest is "need to know". - And I am not "need to know"?
Shhhh.
Sheriff! Ringing out here!
There.
- It's coming from the trunk - Yeah.
- Dewey... - They need everyone to stay back.
- Not now, Sid. - It's my rental.
- Damn. - It's now official crime scene. Let's lock it down.
- Crime scene. - Detach him right out of here. Everybody back. - Give me that camera. - Stand back.
- Give me that camera. - Stand back.
- Please tell me this is a prank, Dewey. - I am afraid not, Sid. Come on.
- Amber, you re not gonna believe this...
- Stand back, Gale. Gale. - Just wanna see.
Ok, essays are due Tuesday, "Why Woodsboro is the best..."
Anything with an on-off swith should be off, that's the rule.
Somebody wanna share?
Jenny Randall and Marnie Cooper were murdered last night. - What?
- What? - Stabbed to death.
- What's your favorite scary movie? - Shut up!
Y'all Tuesday, class is not hold then - That was fast.
This week marks the anniversary of the infamous Woodsboro murders.
Two girls killed the exact day local celebrity victim Sidney Prescott chose to return to her hometown.
It could be something right out of a Gale Weathers' best seller. And where is she now?
Well, living right here in Woodsboro, cos she's the wife of Sheriff Dewey Riley - Mrs Riley - Hoss.
- First Lady. - Perkins.
Excuse me, Gale. He's conducting an interview.
- Great! I love interviews. - You have to wait, Gale. Sorry, can't let you in there.
What are you gonna do? Arrest me, Deputy Judy?
If it comes to it. Civilian interference with a police investigation poses many a problem in a court of law.
Ok. Listen to me Judy. I don't mind that you re working with my hudband.
Or that you re even baking those little treats, as you do
But if you re gonna start acting like him, you gotta put a mustache on, cos you sound ridiculous - Gale.
- Judy. - Gale!
Deputy. Gale. Calm please.
- Uh, Sidney, if you don't mind giving us a minute. - Sid. - Hi, Gale.
Dewey, would you please explain to Betty Crocker that I have every right to be here?
If there's been another murder in Woodsboro obviusly....
- That is not public information. - It is all over the Internet, Dewey.
- It is? - Yes, the whole world knows about it before me.
She wants to be a part of the investigation, Sheriff.
Ok. Hang on. Uhm, are you familiar with the phrase "I wrote a book on this" ?
- Gale, with all due respect, I don't see how that pertains to... - Because I wrote the book on this.
"The Woodsboro murders" by Gale Weathers. - But you re not a reporter anymore, Gale.
- Woh, woh,woh.. - And even if you were...
Woh. Don't treat me like I'm the media.
I helped solve these things. 3 times, remember? You and me, together.
- But I am the Sheriff now, Gale. - Right?
- What, you re not gonna help you with this? - I can't.
Allright then, I am going rogue. This is what I am good at, Dewey. This is what I know how to do.
Your lemon squares taste like ass.
- They don't. They really don't. - Thank you, Sir.
- Sheriff. - Yeah? - We got a couple high school kids in here.
We got a couple high school kids in here.
Two of em, they say they got threatening phone calls this morning from the victims' phones.
- Names are Olivia Morris and Jill Roberts. - That's Sid's cousin. Damn.
- Right in here, Sheriff. - Hey, Jill.
- Sidney. Hi. - Hi.
It's nice to see you, even under the circumstances.
- You ok? - Yeah.
- So two of you got phone calls? - Yeah, us two. "What's your favorite scary movie?".
It was the killer's voice. From Stab. From, I mean you know, from your life.
I am Kirby, by the way. I am their friend.
- And the killer didn't call you? - No.
This is..this is a bad thing? Does that mean that I am not gonna live as long as these two?
No...Maybe. Of course not. Just...just be careful.
- Oh my God, did you hear that? I am gonna be next! - Dewey, I shouldn't be here. I should leave town.
I am afraid that's not really possible, Sidney.
Look, nobody thinks you re involved but everyone's a suspect. I am sorry.
And there was evidence in your car connecting the killer to you. You may be a material witness.
- So, you know, you ll have 24 hour police surveillance. - That's comforting.
It's Rebecca. Oh my fucking God, Henry. Yes! Its true. Two girls butchered. Pay day.
I was so not feeling Woodsboro. Was like lame PR, am I right? Well, fuck me wow! Best idea ever.
Henry, I ll call you back.
Excuse me. I have to geek out. I hadn't got a chance to say something earlier, but it's suck an honor to meet you.
- Thank you. - Rebecca Walters.
- Hi. - When I was a kid it was all about top story with Gale Weathers.
- You were my 90s! - Well, it's Gale Riley now.
You gave it all for love, I know that. How long have you and Dewey been married?
- Ten years. - Oh, just like your characters in Stab 3. Wow!
Wow...
I didn't mean "bad wow", it's just, it always seemed like more of a horror movie romance than a real one
because it was a movie, and in real life it should never be.
Uh, dug a hole. Climbing out, here. So anyway,
Kudos on being brave enough to drop off the professional map. Any plans on revitalizing your tarnished brand
Listen, in about 2 seconds I am gonna revitalize your face... with my tarnished brand.
I still got it.
Uhm, tasty.
She's so pretty. When you think about what she survived. She must have scars everywhere.
Shhhh, Come on.
Her mom is my sister. I have scars too. None ever asks me about my scars.
- I am sorry Mrs Roberts. - She means nice scars, mom.
Oh, well. Fine.
- How are you? How's Gale? - I am alright. But Gale,
it's been hard on her. Small town. Small town husband. Not much to write about.
- You two ok? - Well, i read somewhere once "Just when you think things can't get any worse,
sometimes they don't...Sometimes, they get better.", Out of Darkness by Sidney Prescott, page 220.
Gotta get going.
- It's nice to see you, Dewey. Been thru a lot together. - We ll get thru this too, ok?
I ll go.
Be good. It's ok. Relax, relax. It's just me.
- What the hell are you doing here? There are cops right out front. - No match for the ninja, baby.
Anyway, what are you doing in the house of Sidney Prescott? I mean, that's like being on Top Chef with Jeffrey Dahmer.
Can you please get away from the window? You've no right to be in here. Not anymore.
Hang on. I heard you got a phone call from the killer. Is that true?
- And you care? - Don't you think it'd be a lot safer with me around?
- I don't trust you, Trevor. - Hey. I am just gonna have to make sure that you do. Alright?
Oh, sorry, I didn't... - No, he's just leaving. Its...it's my ex.
- Oh. - Yeah, the one and only.
- Hi. - Hi.
It's cool to meet you...officially. I keep meaning to pick up a copy of your book, but...
You re smaller in person.
- What? - Nothing, you just, ehm, you remind me of me.
- Lock your window, ok? - Yeah, goodnight.
Night.
- Sorry about that. Just making my rounds before taking off. - Great, thanks.
- You don't remember me, do you? - Sorry?
We went to High School together. Judy Hicks?
We had the same Homeroom in. Drama club too. We were in Peter Pan together. I played a Lost Boy.
- You were... Tiger Lily. - I am sorry, it was a long time ago.
It's ok, ehm. You had a lot of stuff going on back then.
Well, it's nice to see you again, Judy. - You too.
- Everything ok upstairs? - You re supposed to be out front, Perkins.
- 4 letter word for...courage? - Uh, guts.
- It's Olivia Morris, she lives next door. She's on the list. - She can live next door to me.
Now seriously, ehm, Mary I am warning you, ok? I am gonna have to get physical. I mean it. This is it! Just fuck off!
- Hello? - What are you guys up to?
Uhm, we re watching Shaun of the Dead. - You know there's two zombies sitting outside your house in a car?
- Yeah, they are cops. You wanna come up? - Angel of Death leave?
- No, she's in the guest room. - Forget it. Next door is close enough.
- Your mom home? - She's at her boyfriend's. It's creepier in here tonight.
No, the zombies are still in their car, so you should be alright.
- Call me tomorrow, ok? - Right.
- She wanna come up? - She fears the Reaper.
Watch this.
- Who's speaking? - What's your favorite scary movie, Olivia?
It's the worst imitation I've ever heard, Jill. Speaking of Stab, you heard where the Stab- a- thon's gonna be at?
No. It doesn't matter to me anyways, mom doesn't let me go.
- It's Trevor, I'll handle this. - Trevor is calling...again.
-What do you want? - I wanna talk to Jill.
Uhm, no it's Kirby. Sorry, Trevor, Jill is screening her calls from all past relationships.
-What's going on over there? - Hang on one sec. What is he saying?
- I am not Trevor. - W-What? I can barely hear you, Trevor.
- This isn't Trevor. - Oh, oh, alright. Then why do you have his phone?
- Whoever this is. He's trying to do Ghostface. - He's being weird.
- I wanna talk to Jill. - Ok, well, she doesn't want to talk to you.
Come on, Mr Ghostface, whisper to me. Aren't you supposed to ask me a question?
- Alright. How's the movie? - What movie?
- Shaun of the Dead. - How did you know that?
- Because I'm standing in the closet. - Stop, you're not.
- What's going on? - Trevor is being weird.
- I mean, if it is him, I dunno. - What?
- This is not fucking Trevor! - Well, then who the fuck are you?
- Open the closet door. - You do know there are cops all over this house?
I think that I have just enough time to slice someone open.
- I'll talk to him. - Shhhhhh.
- What's going on over there, you guys? -
- S-Sorry, I dunno. Kirby? -Shhhhhh.
S-Sorry, I-I dunno. Kirby? - Shhhh.
- Kirby. - Come on, do it.
- There is no way you re in there. - See for yourself.
Kirby? Kirby, come on, talk to me. This isn't funny! Kirby!
- Liar. I am over this. - I never said I was in your closet.
Oh my God!
- Olivia! - Oh my God!
Help, in my house!
No!
No. No!
- Hoss! - Olivia!
Perkins!
Shit.
- What? - Welcome home Sidney. Preview of coming events.
- Why don't you come for me? You got the balls for that? - Oh, poor Sidney. You think this is all about you?
- You think you're still the star. - This isn't a fucking movie!
- It will be. - These are innocent people.
Spare me the lecture! You've done very well by all this blood shed, haven't you? How about the town you left behind?
I ve got plans for you. I am gonna slit your eyelids in half so you don't blink when I stab you in the face.
You'll die when I want you to, Sidney. Not a moment before. Until then, you re going to suffer.
- Sidney! - Jill? Stay right there.
- Is she... - Do not look, ok?
- She said you were the Angel of Death. - Look out!
- Come look. Look over there. - He's in here.
- Where is he? - He was...
- What's your status? - Jill?
- Don't.
What happened? Oh my God, Jill.
Jesus. Your hon, 'Vis. Baby, baby. Come here. Come on, let's go, let's go. Let's get care of you, right?
- Jill? Oh my God. Are you ok? - Give me a hand.
- Keep your pressure on it. - There's somebody back there.
- Call it in. - Right.
- Hey, are you ok? - You should look upstairs.
Let's get the corners and rub around these.
Thought this was over!
It's all your fault, Sidney.
Just like her mother!
I am sorry of what I said.
- Shouldn't you get that looked at? - Yeah.
- What the hell happened? - Ok, I saw him going to that yard, two houses down, right before.
- A-A-And I circled around to cut him off. - And?
- And I met Hoss coming from the other direction. - No, he must have circled back around somehow. He's like a ghost.
- Chief, we're sorry. - We feel terrible.
Alright. Get outta here.
This is Hall Pass with Robbie Mercer webcasting live in our darkest hour.
What began as a day of remembrance, has ended with a serial murder.
Olivia Morris, who officially would never go out with me, is dead. So is Jenny Randall and Marnie Cooper.
Our local legacy, the Stab movies, is coming to life.
- Excuse me, are you recording with that thing? - My video blog upload. He's webcasting right now.
- Mind turning it off? A little old school, off the record? - Can't. Owe it to my audience.
- Turn the fucking thing off. - Ok...
- So, you two are the boys who run the movie club at Woodsboro High, huh?
- Oh, Charlie rents it. I'm just VP, in case he takes a bullet. - It's called Cinema Club.
- So you must have a very unique insight into the movie buffs at your school? - Maybe.
What if we could catch the killer, by working together?
Two generations of cutting edge journalists intertwining our passions for media.
- What would you say? - I love you?
Very good. Now, you give me your expertise on the gore geek scene at Woodsboro High and maybe I give you something in return
- Say, a celebrity visit to your Cinema Club...by me? - What about Sidney?
- Hey, you know her, right? I am you're friends with her?
No offense but, that'd be a big deal for some of the club. A visit from Sidney Prescott, I mean, she's the star.
Uh, yes she's Daniel Radcliffe to my J.K. Rowling.
- When was the bookshelf in the box office? - Never.
- There's no broken bones. I think you'll be fine. Maybe just take a couple weeks off.
So, Sidney...Uh, ouh. Anyway, long story short , Random wants to lock you into 3 more books, now.
See the blank line in your contract? You can name your phrase.
And as soon as you re clear in this investigation, we re on the next plane to New York.
- I booked Today, The View, Nancy Grace, MTV News. - Excuse me, can I...can I ask you a question?
- Did you read my book? - Thought I'd wait for the movie.
- Book tour is over. - Sidney. Accept your situation. You re a victim, for life. So, embrace it, use it.
I know you care about your readers. All those little down-trodden fucks that just need a light at the end of their
tunnels so they don't jump off a bridge. And a lucky break like this? I am talking a 100 percent increase in sales, minimum.
That's maybe a million more people getting your message and you get a ton more checks. Win-win.
- I won't be needing you anymore. - Sidney!
- You re fired. - Fired?
- Fired! - Fine.
"What do you think about my book, Rebecca?"
The problem of Sidney is she never gets laid. Or even a little shit faced once in a while.
She'll call me at 9 to apologize. Just watch.
She'll come around. Gotta just give her time. Sidney will come....around.
- This is Rebecca. - Sidney Prescott, please.
I am handling Ms Prescott's calls and appearances. May I take a message?
You are the message. Are you writing this down? - Yes, I am.
But, it's kinda hard to hear you. I'm in a hospital, with Sidney. If you can just hang on one second.
I've got time. It's you that doesn't.
You know, Rebecca, it doesn't sound to me like you re in the hospital.
Sounds like you re in a parking garage. A dark and deserted parking garage.
But if you wanna be in the hospital, I'd be happy to put you there. In the morgue!
Help! Help! Save me!
Cut and run, you fucking bastard.
This is an ongoing investigation. But rest assured, we re pursuing a number of leads.
-Sheriff - The less I say about that, the better.
So, I'm taking questions.
- Dewey! - Gale?
Any comment on the fact that these killings seem to resemble the pattern of the original Woodsboro murders?
Hun? Later!
What was that, Sheriff?
As I was saying...my officers are hard at work.
We just want the community to know that we re very close to bringing this whole situation under control.
Hey, someone! Get up to the top of the structure! Go! Go!
- Everyone back! Stay back! - Back, nobody move!
Jenkins, I want a man on this stairwell.
- You see anybody? - Nobody out there.
There's nobody out there, Sheriff!
- It's all under control huh, Sheriff? - But what am I supposed to say?
Listen, I may not be wearing a uniform, but I happen to have a lead and you don't.
So let me know when you re back on Team Gale.
Move back, I am the Sheriff.
Ok, Cinema Club, we re not in session. Welcome. I'll tell you a little bit about ourselves.
We re a sanctioned after school activity, one rung below the Glee club, two above Nintendo Wii Fit
and let me just say to our guest , Sidney Prescott, it's an honor.
Beyond Jamie Lee Curtis, forget Linda Blair, I mean, this is the ultimate.
Thanks, I-I guess. This, uhm...you film your entire High School experience and what, post it on the net?
- Everybody will be doing it someday, Sid. - It's kind of the one component the killer is missing.
- Wait, what do you mean? - Well, if you wanna be the new "new version", the killer should be filming the murders.
That's like the natural next step in the psycho slasher innovation. I mean you film em all real time
- and then before you get caught, you upload em into cyberspace. - Making your art as immortal as you.
- Not to implicate him... - Not to implicate me...
-So who do you think is behind the murders? - Well, it's a Stab fanatic, clearly.
Working on less of a Screquel and more of a Screamake. - Copyrighted terms, by the way.
Cos all there are now are remakes. Only horror the studios green-light.
I mean, there are still rules, but the rules have changed. The unexpected is the new cliché.
Yeah, you gotta have an opening sequence that blows the doors off
done with some flashy music video direction. And the kills gotta be way more extreme.
Modern audiences got savvy to the rules of the originals, so the reversals become the new standard.
In fact, the only surefire way to survive a modern horror movie, you pretty much have to be gay.
So, why are you so sure that the killer is working by the rules of a horror remake? - Well, the original Stab structure is pretty apparent.
- Two kids killed in a house while their parents are away. - And then the school's "hot chick" savaged beyond recognition.
- We all know where it goes from there... - A party.
- Exactly. A party. Guaranteed third act main cast blood bath. - Fingers crossed on some nudity for a change.
- Ok, do you know of a party that's happening tonight? - Well, there's Stab- a- thon.
- Stab- a- thon? - Uh, It's a movie marathon. All 7 Stabs back to back. We do it every year.
- Is tonight? There's a killer out there patterning his murders after the original movie. - I know, it's pretty wild.
We have to call it off.
- Uhm, ok, I mean, it's Friday. I am sure we re not the only party that's going on at Woodsboro.
- But where is this circle-jerk gonna take place? - So, let's ready for this Q&A.
- No, no. I really want the location. - You know, it's kind of an underground thing. Email invites. Pretty secret.
What, you re not gonna tell me? Really? We re working together. Remember?
- So you re ready for the Q&A? - Fuck you. Let's go.
That was awesome.
- Nobody comes to the house unless we say so. - Got it.
I feel like I'm under house arrest.
You know when people say "I know how you feel", but you know they re just saying that because they really have no
freaking idea how you feel? I know how you feel.
I am so sorry about Olivia.
I am sorry about your publicist.
How do you handle it, people staring at you all the time? - People stare at me?
I could never handle that kind of attention. I just feel like it would take over your whole life.
Uh, all I do is I...try not to think about me. I have people I care about. I focus on them.
And the rest, uhm, it works out.
You saved my life last night. I mean, I know we re family but... you heard a thing on me.
Makes me wonder, you know, if I'd be brave enough to do the same thing.
I really hope you never have to find that out.
Oh, if you need me, you know where to find me.
I'll be up in my cell, oh, I mean, my room.
Our rooms are boarded up. That's the view from my cell. It's really weird.
I think Olivia would understand, ok? She'd want me to be around other people.
Holy shit. Even if I did just crash land on planet dork.
Speaking of which, Trevor's here. - Hey, Kirby.
-What is he doing there? That is so not his scene. - I have no idea, maybe he thought you would be here.
Yeah, fat chance. After what happened last night? I mean, my mum is just completely freaked out.
-It's not prim. - Alright, you go do your good girl thing and I'll drink for the both of us.
- I will keep you posted. - Alright, be safe.
Stab-a-thon! Stab-a-thon!
- Thank you! Thank you. Gracias. Gracias. - Shhhh.
Cinema Club thanks you for coming up for our third annual Stab-a-thon.
Thank you, number-3-thon. We thank you in rows.
- Are you ready to drink every time someone can't get a cellphone signal? - Yeah!
- Are you ready to drink every time someone shuts the refrigerator door and, oh my God, there's the harmless character right behind it?
Yeah!
-Are you ready to drink every time somebody screams the word.... - No!
Let's get the Stab-athon started!
Ghostface!
Get out in 5!
Move your ass!
Screw you!
Yes!
Uh, Yeah. Back on my game.
Perfect. New work in progress, chapter 1.
When I moved to Woodsboro, I never in a million years dreamed that I would again play the critical role...
...in solving another series of these...
What the hell?
- Gale, where are you? - I followed the kids to the Stab-a-thon.
There's an old abandoned farm on 4th Dylan Road. Listen, I-I got it under surveillance, but I think the killer is about to make his move.
- What makes you so sure? - You do a remake to outdo the original, that's what the kids said.
This party is all about the Stab movies. Come on, how meta can you get?
- How "what the.." can you get? - I dunno, I heard em say it.
- Dewey, listen to me, you have to get out here. Come on, you catch the killer, I get the story. It's a win-win.
- Well, I thought you were going rogue, Gale. - Oh come..are you serious? C'mon!
- Forget it. Thanks for having faith in me! I gotta fix my equipment. - Gale!
Shit.
Bravo, well...very well done, very, I'm very impressed. Kind of. Kinda impressed. Not Really.
- That'll do. - Yeah? - Yeah.
- Yeah, she wants you. - Yeah. Yeah.
Nooooooo!
Ghostface.....
- Hello? - Hello.
- Who is this? - Were you expecting somebody now?
You know, I don't even know you... - ...and I dislike you already.
- Hicks, how far are you from 4th Dylan Road? - 5 minutes at the most, Sir.
Well, step on it.
Look out your window.
Gale! Gale, behind you!
No!
Gale!
Freeze!
Get out of the way, you morons!
Dammit.
- Ok, put pressure on that. - Did you catch him?
- No, hopefully your cameras got something. - They weren't the only ones, Dewey.
- What? - There's a webcam... set back there.
- He was watching me. - A webcam?
- He's recording the murders. - What?
This time... he's making the movie.
This Sidney Prescott detail man, I don't like it.
The cops scouting the house, they always get it.
What are you talking about? - It's a movie cop rule.
Sucks to be a cop in a movie. Unless you re Bruce Willis. - Not all cops die in movies.
No, but if it's your last day before retirement you do.
If you re a rookie, some with a wife who's pregnant, you do.
Or if your partner is better looking than you, you do, and by the way, I win that one.
You know what, I'll take the next perimeter. I'll be right back.
Shit.
- I know this one, you re not supposed to say that, are you? - Eh, new decade, new rules.
You know, these days, you might come back, find me dead. Eyes gouged out, tongue sticking out. Could go either way.
- I gotta learn this shit. - Eh, I'll take this one.
- Hey, Hoss. Be careful. - I am always careful.
Dead man walking.
- Perkins, was there a window open on your last perimeter check? Perkins, come in. Over.
Anthony?
Perkins?
- Dammit. - You should have seen the look on your face, rookie.
Hoss! What the fuck!
Holy shit...
Hoss!
Fuck Bruce Willis!
- Sorry. The wind chimes were over here. - It was me, I was trying to fix em, sorry.
- I am just back the store. - Were you shopping?
A stress buster. I got one more bag in the car. I'll be right back.
Jill, you re gonna get that?
- Roberts residence. - You re a survivor, aren't you, Sidney?
Your one and only skill: You survive. Well, I have one question for you.
What good did to be a survivor in this little drama if everyone close to you is dead?
- Who are you? - Turn on the TV to channel 6.
- Who the fuck are you? - Turn it on. Watch the teaser.
...But it nearly turned deadly tonight, with the latest victim of this attack being the wife of the Woodsboro Sheriff...
...Gale Riley, AKA Gale Weathers, who's in serious condition tonight after being stabbed. Her assailant then disappeared...
in a sea of identic.... - Glad you came home, Sidney. Has it been worth it yet?
- Why are you doing this? - Ah, friends count, but it's the family ties that cut deep. Am I right?
- What do you mean? - The ones you care about most. And what's closer than family?
- The bond of blood. - Don't.
You can't save them. All you can do is watch.
Jill!
- Kate! - Sid?
- She's not in her room. - Oh my God.
She's gone at Kirby's. You gotta call her, get her back here. - Ok.
- Come on, Jill! - Leave a message.
- She's not picking up. What's going on? - The killer called, he's coming after me. But he wants my family first.
- Oh God, Jill... - Let's get the cops.
- The cops aren't there. - What?
They were there when I first came in, but they re not there now. - Let's get to Kirby's.
Out the front.
Press up on the bottom. Can you?
Let's get out of here.
Kate, come on! Kate!
- Tell Jill I am so sorry... - No, no, no, no, shhhh...
Kate...
- Hicks. What are you doing? - I just saw somebody coming around the side of the house.
Where are Hoss and Perkins? I couldn't get em on the radio.
- Whose blood is that? - Is...Is Kate's, we were just attacked. She's dead.
- Where is she? - The front door.
- Show me. - Ok.
- Stay here. - Ok.
This is Deputy Hicks. I've got a homicide at the Roberts residence. No sign of Perkins or Hoss.
- Copy that. We'll try to locate em. - I'm so sorry.
You're gonna be fine, alright? I swear. No more on your own. It's you and me, forever.
Easy.
- Dewey. - Yeah?
Promise me something. - Anything.
- Catch that motherfucker. - Absolutely. I love you.
I love you.
- It was chaos. Utter chaos. - I can't believe that.
The Sheriff's wife, man. She told us to cancel it and we didn't and now this? What are we supposed to do?
Robbie, calm down. It makes sense.
- This is about the reboots too. They-they-they one up the original ending.
- "The Woodsboro murders" ended at a party, so in the remake... - ...The party is the false ending. New rules.
- Exactly. - Ok, no offense guys but I'm gonna put in Stab 7.
- Yes... - Nobody cancels my film festival.
Wohaa, I don't wanna watch that. Not after what happened to Olivia. - Oh, come on. It was her favorite.
Oh, wow Kirby. You have some classics here. - Yep.
"Suspiria","Don't look now"... - You know it. I can trivia your ass under the table, cinema boy.
Oh, yeah? Who played Leatherface first? - Gunnar Hansen.
Wow, did you feel that?
- The charge that moved between us, then? - Oh, that was me. I have powers.
So sexy...
You guys are unbelievable. You re playing fucking trivia games? The cops are gonna come for us, they are gonna shut down my website.
-We re so dead! - Yeah. I agree.
- Jesus Christ, where did you come from? - The front door. By the way Kirby, with everything that's going on right now...
...you probably shouldn't leave that unlocked. - Sorry...
- And...May I ask what the hell are you doing here? - Why, didn't I find the after-party?
- No, you found the Anti-party and it's invitation only. - Yeah, well, I got an invitation. From Jill.
So, what's the story? - What?
- You sent me a text message.After-party at Kirby's house. I mean, it was from your phone.
What do you mean, from my phone? Oh, where is my phone? I think I left it in your car, I didn't text him.
I didn't text you. And I'll prove it!
So, Charlie, Robbie, how does it feel to be accessories to a crime, huh?
- I mean, really? Dewey's wife? - My life is over.
So which one of you guys sent me a text message from Jill's phone, huh?
- W-We re just supposed to accept that you re telling the truth? - Isn't your phone missing?
- Got a new one. - Really? Oh, that's incredibly convenient.
Dewey, it's Hicks. - What's up?
- Kate Roberts is dead. - Huh?
- And Sidney fled the scene. - What, what happened to Kate?
- She was stabbed, just like the others. - And what about Jill?
- No sign of her at all - Where the hell were Hoss and Perkins?
They were found dead in their car two blocks away. Multiple stab wounds.
Ok. I'm on my way. - Yes, Sir.
- Wrong number. - Who was that?
- Oh, nobody. - Did you pick a movie?
- Yeah, we re gonna go scary: Saw IV. - Oh, I saw that in theaters. It sucks.
It's not scary, it's gross. I hate all that torture porn shit.
Why, angry feel.
- Well, I like Jigsaw. I think he kills people very creatively. - But she don't give a shit who dies...
...cos there's no character to fill a man. It's just body parts whipping and blood spewing...
Charlie, you wanna sit next to me?
Alright...Get ready for a Hall Pass with Robbie Mercer extra. Now tonight, there is a good chance that Charlie Walker,
yes, my Charlie Walker, may get lucky with a girl. Now I'm unable to , to publish my exact location, however, suffice it to say...
Woodsboro High may be in store for some geek history. We'll see.
Hello?
Who's there?
Oh my God.
- Where are you going? - To make sure the front door is locked.
- No, don't open it. - You're overreacting.
Hey, Charlie. - Yeah?
I'm sorry, I know you re into the movie and all , but...now would be a really good time to make a move.
- For me to make a move? -Mhh mhh.
- Couldn't you make a move? - I just did.
Cos you re actually pretty cute. Especially when I'm scared...and lonely...and drunk.
Ehi, guys. Did...did you see Jill, coming? I didn't see her outside. - Yes, Trevor. She is upstairs.
Thank God you re here to protect her when you can't even find her.
- There's nobody out here. - Oh, dude. I love this part of the movie. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- What is it say? - Just when you think they're all safe and comfortable in the house
Ghostface comes in and bang!
- Did I interrupt something for you? Shut the fuck up. - Who invited you, Trevor?
Alright. Clearly not you. Wow.
- I'm moving upstairs. - Get out of my house!
Ehi, ok, I'm a little drunk so, don't blame your Internet connection.
Let's see what Charlie is up to, shall we? Or the saga of Trevor and Jill...
Oh, intrigue of Woodsboro High. Who needs to kill around with so much drama?
Oh, man...
Yeah... That's better.
Wait, no!. You can't, you can't, there's rules.
I-I-I'm gay, I'm gay. I mean, if it helps...
...some random girl who gets a call that undoubtedly ends up getting her killed.
It's all so predictable. There's no element of surprise. You can see ev...
Kirby! So, my phone was up in your room. There was no text message sent to Trevor. He is such a liar.
- Where is he? - What do you mean, where is he, he just went upstairs looking for you.
- He's not upstairs. - Trevor! Charlie! Robbie!
Maybe they are outside.
Jill...................................... No, it's ok, just I need you to come with me. Sidney! I am sorry, I should have told you and mom where I was going.
Come with me right now, ok? Run.
Robbie!
Go!
Sidney!
Come on!
- The balcony! - There's no other way out?
- We can jump? - It's two stories. Where's your cell? Get under the bed.
- What? - Just do what I say. Get under the bed and don't make a sound and don't come out till I come get you.
- Just go. Trust me! - Ok.
You got it? You ok? Jill, run. Just keep running. Get out!
- Hello? - Dewey!
- Sidney, where are you? - I'm at Kirby's. The killer is here, I need your help.
- I'm on my way. - Ok.
Sid! Sidney!
- I need all units to 329 Whispering Lane. - All units! 329 Whispering Lane!
Sorry, it's just me. Look, I tried to call 911 with the land line instead, but someone smashed the router.
I think I called them myself - Well, where's Jill?
Go, go, go, go!
- There's a room down there. We can lock ourselves in.
- I heard you yelling to Jill. Did she get away? - I think she's safe.
- Kirby, let me in! - Charlie...
No, no, no, no, no, don't. I just found Robbie. It's...It's just his blood, please.
- Please, there is someone else out here. Let me in. - If you can't trust him, don't open the door.
- My God! Let me in! - Get away from the door, Charlie.
- Kirby, it's me! Please let me in! - Get away from the door, Charlie!
- It's me! - I'm sorry, I can't...
What the fuck... - I am sorry.
Behind you! Look out!
No, no, no, no, no!
Kirby!
Oh, no, God, no. He's...Leave him alone!
Leave him alone!
- It's Charlie's phone. - Tell Sidney heads are gonna roll tonight. Tell Sidney it's all because of her.
- Or maybe she wants into his place. I promise to be quick. - It's him.
Ok, I'm gonna get Jill, she should be in the same place. Just-just keep him on the phone, I'll be right back ok?
- Let him go, please... - I hear you like horror movies, Kirby. But do you like em so much as him?
- Forget watching Stab. You get to live it. - No, no, no, no, no. He's the expert, it's not me.
- Warm up question: Jason's weapon? - Uh, it's a machete.
- There, you see? You do know the genre. Michael Mayers? - Uh, butcher knife.
- Leatherface? - A chainsaw. Please...
- Just ask Sidney if you need some help. Freddy Krueger? - Uh, uh, razor hands.
- Name the movie that started the slasher craze: "Halloween", "Texas Chainsaw Massacre", "The Last House on the Left" or "Psycho"?
- "Psycho". - None of the above. "Peeping Tom". 1960, directed by Michael Powell.
- First movie to ever put the audience in the killer's POV. - Wait, wait. No, no, no, no.
- Please, just ask me one more question, just one more. - Alright, Kirby. Then it's time for your last chance question.
- Name the remake of the groundbreaking horror movie in which the villain...
"Halloween", "Texas Chainsaw", "Dawn of the Dead", "The Hills Have Eyes", "The Amityville Horror", "The Last House on the Left"
"Friday the 13th", "A Nightmare on Elm Street", "My Bloody Valentine", "When a Stranger Calls", "Prom Night"
"Black Christmas", "House of Wax", "The Fog", uh, "Piranha". It's one of those, right? Right?!
I got it right. I was fucking right!
Jill?
- I won, Charlie. I fucking won. I won. He tried to beat me, but I fucking won. - It's so great...
- Wait, I'm almost there. Just hang tight. - Kirby? This is making a move.
- 4 years of classes together and you notice me now? You stupid bitch! It's too late!
-Shh, shhhh, I know, I know. It's ok, take your time.
- Doesn't happen as fast as it does in the movies, honey. - Charlie...
Kirby?
You know, you learn the law when you watch the movies over and over.
All the plots are about trying to kill you.
- Where's Jill? - Oh, you think she's gonna get away? You think anyone gets away?
- Jill? - Hello, Sidney. Surprised?
Watch this. This is the part when, dear cousin, the cameras...turn off.
- Charlie? - Want her taken care of.
Then I got great footage in my Robbie kill. Better than Jenny and Marnie or Olivia even.
Good. We'll cut and upload it later. Make it all traceable to Trevor.
Speaking of which...Remind you of anything?
- Jill, please... - Shut up! Dick.
- Everything I learned, I learned from you. - You think you had a shitty boyfriend, Sidney?
Here's one that fucks you, dumps you and doesn't even make you famous. - What the fuck, Jill, I loved you!
- Shut the fuck up, already!
Sure those cops wanted you to have this, Jill. For your protection.
Put it dow...
- Ehi, please. - Shouldn't have killed all those people; Trev. Gone and put it on video even.
- But it means a lot that you did it for me. - What the fuck are you talking about?
I am NOT the girl you cheat on.
- I've gone thru everything. We're definitely good on timeline. - Oh, yeah. We're perfect.
No, no, no. Please.
Ready for act 3?
- Have figured it out yet, Sidney? Keeping it to our remake theme, Trevor is this generation's Billy Loomis
and we're the innocent victims: Sidney and Randy.
See, with you, the world just heard about what happened but with us, they're gonna see it.
It's gonna be a worldwide sensation. And people gotta see this shit. It's not like anyone reads anymore.
I gonna know fame like you never even dreamed of.
Last two teenagers standing. This time Randy gets the girl. You're amazing. And you're the perfect victim.
I was so believable today, wasn't I? I mean, I told so many lies, I actually started to believe them. I really think that I was born for this.
- How could you do this? - Do you know what it was like growing up in this family?
Related to you? I mean, all I ever heard was: Sidney this and Sidney that, and Sidney, Sidney, Sidney.
- You were always so fucking special! Well, now I am the special one. - You'll slip, they always do.
- Come on, Charlie. Let's go on with this. You have to be strong and hold still. Ok? - Yeah, yeah, old school, like Billy and Stu. Come on, baby, get it up. Come on.
Shoulder me, shoulder me, shoulder me. Get it up!
Not the way we rehearsed it.
You said it, Charlie: Billy and Stu. Trevor and you.
What the media really loves, baby, is a sole survivor. Just ask you know who. Trevor was your partner and you, you were the idea man.
- Even your friends? - My friends? What world are you living in? I don't need friends. I need fans.
Don't you get it?! This has never been about killing you. It's about...becoming you.
I mean, for fuck's sake, my own mother had to die, no great loss there, so I could stay true to the original.
It's sick, right? Well sick is the new sane. You had your 15 minutes, no I want mine!
I mean, what am I supposed to do? Go to college, grad school, work? Look around, we all live in public now, we re all on the Internet.
How do you think people become famous anymore? You don't have to achieve anything. You just gotta have fucked up shit happen to you.
So, you do have to die Sid. Those are the rules. New movie, new franchise. There's only room for one lead and, let's face it,
your ingenue days, they are over.
Don't tell me you didn't know this day would come.
Oh, fuck!
Come on! Let's move in!
- Check the rooms, both sides and upstairs. - Yes Ma'm.
Jill can you give us a description...Over here...Jill...Jill, how does it feel to be a hero?...
- Jill. You made it. That's all that matters. - True, Charlie and Trev tried to kill me.
And I heard they killed my mom. And Robbie and Kirby too. - Shhh. Just lay back. Try to rest.
- Is-is your wife... - She's gonna be fine. She's tough.
If I ever write a book one day I'd, I'd want her to write it with me. It'd be a good team with our matching wounds and all.
We're survivors now. I just wish Sidney was too. - Jill, they re not sure yet. It's still touch and go.
But she's in ICU (intensive care unit) and they think Sidney just might make it.
What? I mean, I saw Trevor kill her. - Look, we don't know yet. But she's hanging on.
I-I-I wanna se her. - She's not awake yet. And, she may not remember anything. You'll have to help her with that.
All in time. Just get some rest now, ok?
- She gonna be ok? - Yeah, she's a strong kid.
- She's gonna have to be. - She asked if you were ok. She thinks you guys should write a book together.
- With your matching wounds. - Why, she was stabbed in the shoulder?
- How did she know I was too? - Shit!
You just won't die, will ya? Who are you, Michael fucking Mayers? Yeah, I don't think so.
Fucking die already!
How are those stitches?
Sidney!
- Hicks, get to the Sidney Prescott's room and call for backup! - Be right up, Sir.
- Sid? Sid. - Dewey!
Is this how it's gonna be, Sid? The ending of the movie was supposed to be at the house. I mean, this is just...silly.
Consider this an alternate ending. You're not gonna get out of this, Jill.
- Of course I will. - Dewey?
Sid...
- Easy..Wait, wait. What about the book? - Looks like I'll just have to write it myself.
Goddammit!
Don't even think about shooting or I'll blow Dewey's head off.
- What, you think I won't do it? Give me your gun! - Do it.
You just had to be the hero, huh? Give me your gun.
What are you, deaf? Give me...your gun.
- And get up. And keep your hands over your head. - Don't do anything stupi...
Don't fucking tell me what to do.
- Oh, God... - Now, get up bitch.
- Ok. - Get up. Now!
- Ok... - Come on. Let's go. Get your skinny ass out here.
- Ok... - I'm gonna enjoy blowing your head off.
Ok, but can I just have one final word? - What? Please?
- No...
- Clear. - Clear?
Clear!
You forgot the first rule of remakes, Jill: Don't fuck with the original.
- Oh my God, Dewey. - Uh, what hit me?
Don't ask. You ok?
- She was standing right behind? - They always are.
- Oh, God... - Nice one.
- Hicks, you're alive? - Wear the vest, save your chest.
I got two officers down, several injuries and a new suspect.
We need a doctor, Goddammit!
I dunno about you, but I feel a whole lot better.
We're live at Woodsboro Community Hospital, awaiting a first public statement from Jill Roberts, survivor.
...a survivor of what is now being called "the Woodsboro Massacre reboot"...
...Jill Roberts is her name. A name the whole world will now know...
...who single-handedly put a stop to this 21st century Woodsboro killing spree...
...Jill Roberts of Woodsboro, a girl who's lifted all our spirits tonight. An American hero, right out of the movies.
== Stabs and Sid by lorez ==
-=THE LAST FANTASY=- 荣誉出品 本字幕仅供学习交流，严禁用于商业途径
-=TLF字幕组=- 翻译：yhaiyang72 校对：浮夸
- 你好？ - 你好！
- 你是？ - 你是谁？
- 你找谁？ - 我在跟谁说话？
- 打错了 - 谁？
- 不知道 - 挑好电影了吗？
- 一部恐怖片，电锯惊魂4 - 我在电影院看过，很烂
- 不吓人，很恶心，
- 讨厌变态的影片 - 这么正派
我喜欢“竖锯”
- 他杀人的手段很有创意 - 但是他才不管谁死…
都是些只会喷血没有个性的角色
- 你在跟谁发短信？ - Facebook上的人，他一直给我留言
Facebook：社交网站
- 说什么了？ - 就是“美女你真性感，我要杀了你”之类的
- 删了他 - 删过了，他又找到我了
- 举报他 - 他很性感，你看
- 那是钱宁·塔图姆 - 不是吧，确定？
Channing Tatum：钱宁·塔图姆，美国演员、制片人，曾任模特儿。
是阿伯克龙比的广告上的 你被耍了
- 你好？ - 你是谁？
刚跟你说话没耐心的人
- 你不用这么贱吧？ - 当然不，来咬我啊！
- 敢挂电话我就杀了你！ - 是谁啊？
找你的
- 喂？ - 你是谁？
- 楚蒂，你是谁？ - 你死前将见到的人
- 恶作剧，挂了吧 - 干嘛把电话给我？
- 因为你有追求者啊 - 门锁了吗？
别怕
别接
是那个追求者，让我“接电话”
有人在跟我们开玩笑呢，
可能是莱克茜或凯伦
- 你要去哪 - 确认门锁好没有
- 别开 - 别太当真
楚蒂，这是个恶作剧，
有人申请假个人资料想吓吓你
等等，谁在外面？
谁啊？我们报警吧
"你敢开门吗？" 别开，雪梨，我怕
可能是大毛、二毛、三毛在吓我们
说不定是钱宁·塔图姆噢
鬼影都没
说啥了？
“我不在外面，就在你身旁”
开玩笑！
- 怎么？ - 这太差劲了，尽瞎扯
什么死亡的恐惧就在面前
- 可我被吓到了 - Facebook杀手？得了吧
Twitter杀手更合理
Twitter：用户量次于Facebook的美国社交网站
一群青少年坐在一起，谈论着恐怖片
直至被“鬼脸”将其杀光
早已设计好的后现代的烂剧情
96年就有了
我喜欢[Stab]系列电影
它们比外星人
僵尸，古老的鬼女，更恐怖
而是生活中存在的杀手，用刀把你…咔嚓了
- 可能在现实中发生的 - 我受不了，这帮人没完没了
重复弱智的剧情
开头无非就是一个女孩接了个电话，然后就被杀了
剧情都能猜到，没惊喜
看了开头就知道结尾
这算惊喜不？
- 为啥捅我？ - 你话太多
闭上臭嘴看电影
太棒了，我看了五次了
看一次吓一次
不是吧，我都没感觉
Twilight Zone：美剧[阴阳魔界]
- 就跟[阴阳魔界]一样 - [阴阳魔界]…
- 一部套着一部 - 我明白，但逻辑上…
回避的问题是：如果[stab6]是[stab7]的开头
[stab5]是[stab6]的开头
那[Stab4]呢？
- 你想太多了 - 是想多了还是你没想过
稍微一想就知道为啥我不看这片子了
你居然没看过，我们可是住在伍兹伯勒啊
这跟伍兹伯勒有什么关系
我以为你说的[Stab]系列是根据真实故事改编的
前三部的确，那是希尼·普雷斯科特的亲身经历
但是她后来不愿意别人拍她的故事
所以编剧们就开始虚构了
[Stab5]还有时间旅行，最烂的一部
- 每年出新你看不够吗？ - 至少伍兹伯勒还有点名
你听到了吗？
- 没有 - 我听到了
珍妮，你别吓我
我没吓你
你每次都吓我
真没吓你
你去哪？
跟你说了，我听到了什么
我知道你想吓我
真没有
怎么回事？
我屋的窗户没锁好
- 接一下，马妮 - 好
- 你好？ - 你是谁？
- 马妮，你是谁？ - 你生前见到的最后一个人
什么？
- 哈哈，抱歉 - 无聊！
- 每年都有人会接到这样的电话而死 - 我真不懂你…
马妮？
不错啊，熄灯，电话扔在地上
你真该去导演恐怖电影
诱我到门边，然后你突然跳出来
这个电话的时机刚好
但是你没有变声软件，模仿不了“鬼脸”，对吧？
- 当然可以 - 谁了？
不是变声软件哦
- 特维尔？ - 我像吗？
把我当作你的导演，
- 影片中你有一份有趣的戏，不要演杂哦 - 什么电影？
马妮也在，可她的角色被删除了
死前得好好玩玩你这个金发傻妞
老娘我拥有135的智商和4.0的平均绩点！
- 你把马妮怎么了？ - 她在剪辑室
- 这一点都不好玩 - 当然，这不是喜剧片而是恐怖片
生死在即，赶快逃命吧！
马妮？
片名：惊声尖叫4
- 你觉得怎么样？ - 今天是个周年庆
- 孩子们… - 不，我指展览
- 还不错 - 告诉店主，若不给你致电的话，他的猫就死定了
- 想活的话，低于25迈？ - 警长，不好意思啊
柯比…
- 在你过来前要答应我你不会杀了我 - 怎么了，你做了什么？
- 特维尔昨晚跟我打电话了 - 他为什么打给你！
因为你不接
他知我会告诉你的，他想知道
- 想知道什么？ - 你有多生气
- 先不说这个了 - 好的
- 特维尔昨晚给我打电话了 - 他也给你打了？
他说你表姐来了，就把他的歉意忘了
- 这个理由真有创意 - 天哪…
- 你见了“灾星”没有？ - 什么？
你表姐啊
售书的最后一站，新生的开始，多戏剧啊
- 她是我喜欢看恐怖片的原因 - 她听到会很高兴的
虽然我不是很了解她
她周围的人都死了，除了她
比起[Stab]她更适合[死神来了]
珍妮·兰德尔干嘛给我打？
- 嗨，吉尔 - 嗯？
- 珍妮，是你吗？ - 最喜欢的恐怖片是什么？
- 你是谁？ - 她想干嘛？
- 你是谁？ - 我在问你问题
- 你最喜欢的恐怖片是什么？ - 我挂了
似曾相识唉
- 我早上也接到了马妮一样的电话 - 什么？
- 开过停车线了 - 对不起
“灾星”
- 市长要求中午之前拆完 - 剩25分了
- 早上好，警长 - 早上好，副警长
- 乔？ - 早上好，警长
- 貌似庆典开始了 - 大概高中生们弄得
上一代人的错误将成为下一代的笑柄
很遗憾这是历史规律
我要是能参与你的办案就好了
- 可以增进感情 - 呃
- 盖尔怎么样了 - 还不错，她在写小说
我做了些柠檬糕，在车里
谢谢副警长
警长，吃糕点又不算不忠于妻
但这不忠于我的饮食
- 莱利警长，快回答 - 收到
你要来下兰德尔家看看
警长，情况很不妙
今天希尼·普雷斯科特将与我们分享她的新书[走出黑暗]
根据盖尔·韦德斯笔下真实的你拍了7部[Stab]后
你是不是不乐意继续被写了？
我不怪盖尔，陈年旧事了
做了太久的受害者，我想结束并重新塑造自己
- 这也是我写书的原因 - 这就是希尼·普雷斯科特广受好评的[走出黑暗]
好吧盖尔，重新开始吧
我他妈不知道该写什么！
- 这个新的怎样？ - 对，2.0升级版，随时记录
我是罗比·默瑟，遇到了一大波美女
问一个纪念会的问题：你最喜欢的恐怖片是什么？
- 这就是你那无聊的问题？ - 你从哪听到过？
[Stab1]的台词，嘿，查理
你是恐怖片的粉丝吧，柯比
你最喜欢的恐怖片是什么？
[小鹿斑比]
傻子
真有趣，柯比
- 完全无视你的存在 - 哪儿啊！她喜欢我
意淫的，混蛋
- 我觉得查理喜欢你 - 我也喜欢他，折磨死他
他挺不错的，真的
- 嘿，特维尔你好，再见！ - 我们能谈谈吗？
我很关心你
我不该放手
当你在机场与朋友惜别时，那叫放手
当你说爱一个女孩时，女孩给了你全部
然后你又去找别人，那不叫放手
那叫玩弄，叫背叛
特维尔·谢尔顿，你最喜欢的恐怖片是什么？
看着
我开始相信我完全就是一个受害人
我无法接受
所以，我沉静下来写出了全新的自己
我克服了恐惧，走出了黑暗
这就是[走出黑暗]，谢谢
签名马上开始，请带书排好队
- 很高兴你能来，盖尔 - 恭喜你，希尼
- 我还没看呢，不过… - 我给你一本
- 杜威，嘿 - 你好，希尼
怎么了？
抱歉，我得办公事
大家听着，都站在原地别动，就一会儿
不能离开，警察要办案，谢谢合作
- 就不能等等吗？正有活动呢！ - 不好意思，警察要活动
- 怎么了？ - 这是警察的事情，不要插手
我在和我丈夫说话，朱莉警长
犯罪现场的一部手机被偷了
手机追踪在这一带
- 剩下的就不告诉你了 - 不告诉我？
警长，在这里
这儿
- 后备箱里面 - 杜威？
- 这是犯罪现场，大家离远一点 - 先不要讲
我租的车
- 天哪 - 封锁现场
- 撤了摄像机 - 给我你摄像机
大家远离犯罪现场
- 这是开玩笑的吧？ - 我想不是，走吧
离远一点，盖尔
我就想看看
论文周二交，题目：“为什么伍兹伯勒…”
上课手机要关掉，这是规矩
什么情况？
- 两位同学昨天被杀了 - 啥？！
被刺死的
- 你们最喜欢的恐怖片是什么？ - 闭嘴！
- 记者们来了 - 真快
这周是臭名昭著的伍兹伯勒谋杀案周年庆
在当地著名受害人希尼·普雷斯科特
返乡的当天两名女生被杀害
这可能出现在盖尔书中，她在哪里呢？
就在本地，因为其丈夫是当地警长
- 队长夫人好 - 好
抱歉盖尔，警长正在询问
- 不错，我喜欢采访 - 你得等着，不能进
- 想干啥？逮捕我吗，朱迪警长？ - 如果需要的话我会
平民干扰警察办案是违规的
听我说，我不管你是不是跟我丈夫共事
甚至做点心给他
你若真想像他一样，那你先长些小胡子
因为你太可笑！
你们别闹了
希尼，我先跟她们谈下
你告诉贝蒂·克罗克，我有权进入
如果有命案的话，很明显…
- 这是机密！ - 网上到处都是
- 是吗？ - 当然了，全世界都比我先知道
她想介入调查，警长
请问你对“我写了一本关于这件事的书”熟吗？
盖尔
- 这确实跟你没什么关系… - 因为我写了本书！
- “伍兹伯勒谋杀案” - 但你已经不是记者了
别把我当媒体，我会帮助你的
我帮了你三次，记得吗？
你我一起的
- 我现在是警长，盖尔 - 怎么？
- 你不让我帮你？ - 对
那好，我自己来，我最擅长这个了
你的柠檬糕真难吃
- 其实很好吃 - 谢谢
警长，这里有几个高中生
其中二人今早接到了从受害者手机打来的恐吓电话
她们是奥莉维亚和吉尔
希尼的表妹
- 吉尔 - 希尼表姐
虽然环境不佳，不过见到你还是很高兴的
- 你怎么样？ - 还行
你们接到了电话？
对，问“你最喜欢的恐怖电影是什么”
是[Stab]电影中杀手的声音，你懂的
- 我是她们的朋友，柯比 - 你没接到电话？
没，这意思是我会先死？
呃，可能吧…当然不是！小心点就好
- 天啊，你听见了吗？我将是下一个 - 杜威，我不能在这儿，我得离乡
希尼，恐怕不行
听着，在没有确定的情况下
人人都有嫌疑，请谅解
毕竟你车里有杀人犯留下的证据
你是重要证人
- 我们会全天监视你 - 好吧
我是丽贝卡
亨利，确实有两个女孩被杀了
激动的一天啊！
不喜欢这鬼地方，没人脉，这个想法哈
我等下打过来
抱歉这么冒昧打扰您
以前没有机会
今天见到您很荣幸
- 谢谢 - 我是丽贝卡·沃尔特斯
小时候看的都是您的大作
您陪伴了我整个童年
- 现在是盖尔莱利 - 您为了成人之美，我知道
- 您和杜威结婚多久了？ - 十年
和[Stab3]的主角一样
我不是有意的
恐怖电影中的浪漫总是比现实生活中的强烈
但现实中这永远都不会发生
噢，对不起,那么说…
在名誉的巅峰你选择退出
想恢复被玷污的名誉吗？
我想以我被玷污的名誉揍你
- 还不错 - 嚣张
她真漂亮
你说她能活下来身上会不会很多伤疤
她妈是我妹，我也有疤痕
- 没人问过我的伤疤 - 不好意思啊，罗伯茨夫人
- 她是指漂亮的疤，妈妈 - 好吧
你怎么样？盖尔呢？
我还好，盖尔不是很好
小镇子，很无聊
- 她没什么可写的 - 你们还好吧？
我曾读到过：“事情不能再糟之时
便是否极泰来之时”
出自你的书的第220页
我要走了
很高兴见到你，经历过很多
没事的，这个也会度过的
我走了
- 放松，是我 - 你在这干嘛？
- 警察都在外面 - 不是我的对手，宝贝儿
你在希尼家里干嘛
你知不知道你处境危险
离窗户远点，你不应该在这里
你无权再进来
我听说你接到了杀手的电话，真的吗？
- 关你什么事？ - 你不觉得和我在一起更安全？
- 我不相信你，特维尔 - 我就是要让你相信
- 打扰了，不好意思 - 没事，我前男友，他要走了
对，我是她的唯一
很高兴见到你，本想买你的书，不过…
你真人看上去小了点
- 咋了？ - 没什么，你让我想到了自己
- 锁好窗户 - 好，晚安
安
不好意思
- 只是下班之前再来看看 - 谢谢
- 你不记得我了？ - 抱歉
我们是高中同学，我是朱莉
我们在一起上过课，演过话剧[小飞侠]
我演的那个迷路男
- 你演的萱草 - 抱歉 ，太久记不得了
没事， 你经历了太多
- 很高兴见到你 - 我也是
- 楼上没事吧 - 你应该在前门看着
四个字母，关于勇气
GUTS(勇气)
- 名单上的奥莉维亚，她住隔壁 - 为啥不住我隔壁
来真的啊，玛丽，我警告你啊 我会动手啊，我是认真的，滚开！
- 你好啊 - 你们在干嘛？
- 看[僵尸肖恩] - 你们门口现在有两只僵尸噢
- 那是警察哥哥，你要上来吗？ - 希尼走了吗？
- 在客房 - 算了，我就在隔壁
- 在你妈在家吗？ - 不，她在她男友家
- 今晚有点诡异啊 - 僵尸还在车里
- 今晚应该会很安静 - 明天打给我
- 她不来吗？ - 她害怕杀手
看我的
谁？
- 你最喜欢的恐怖片是什么？ - 你模仿的太烂了，吉尔
- 说起[stab]，你知道那个聚会在哪吗? - 不知道，我妈不让去
- 是特维尔，我来搞定 - 又是特维尔
- 你想干吗？ - 我想和吉尔说话
我是柯比，吉尔不想跟你说话
- 怎么了 - 等等，他说什么？
- 我不是特维尔 - 我听不清楚，特维尔
我不是特维尔！
那你为什么会有这个手机？
- 他在模仿鬼脸 - 他很怪异
- 我想和吉尔说话 - 她不想和你说话
鬼脸先生，你是否该问个问题？
- 好，电影怎么样？ - 什么电影?
- [僵尸肖恩] - 你怎么知道？
- 因为我在衣橱里 - 不可能
- 怎么了？ - 特维尔怪怪的
- 又貌似不是他，我不确定 - 啥？
- 我他妈不是特维尔 - 那你他妈是谁？
打开衣橱门看看
- 你知道周围都是警察吗？ - 这么一会儿足够我开肠破肚了
我来跟他说
- 发生什么？ - 我也不知道
- 快开啊 - 你不可能在那里
自己看啊
柯比，说话啊，这不好玩
- 骗子，我打开看了 - 我没说在你的衣橱里
救命啊
住手！
警察！
妈的
欢迎回家，希尼，先给看事件的预览
- 为什么不直接找我？有种吗？ - 你认为这都是因为你，可怜虫？
- 还自以为是大明星 - 这不是电影
- 会成为电影的 - 她们都是无辜的人
别给我来文的！
这都是你一手造成的，看看你撇下的地方
对你我早有计划，我要剥下你的眼皮
让你看着我是怎么虐杀你的
我若让你死的话，也不差这一时半会儿 我要折磨死你
- 希尼？ - 别过来
- 她死了吗？ - 别看！
- 她说你是灾星 - 当心
- 他在那里 - 在哪？
逃走了
- 吉尔？ - 别靠近我
发生什么了，吉尔？
别担心，我会保护你
- 吉尔！你没事把，按住伤口！ - 后面没找到
我叫支援
- 你没事吧？ - 你还是到楼上看看吧
这都是你的错，希尼
跟她妈一样
我不应该那样说的
你应该去检查一下
发生了什么？
我看到他走进了那边的院子
我绕过去截他
- 然后呢？ - 然后又跟他碰面了
- 他像鬼一样行踪不定 - 警长，我们很抱歉
- 我们也难过 - 好吧，去吧
罗比·默瑟为您网播最悲痛的时刻
今天本是个纪念的日子，却又以谋杀结尾
奥莉维亚，再也不能与我散步校园的同学被害 哀悼我们失去的三位同学
我们当地的“特色”--[Stab]系列电影将成为现实
- 你在录像吗 - 我们是播客团队，他正在网络直播
可以关上吗？我们谈谈
- 不行，观众看着呢 - 老娘叫你关上！
你们在学校开了个电影俱乐部是吧？
查理开的，我是副社长
- 以防哪天他死了没人接管 - 官方名为“剧院俱乐部”
- 那么你们对电影很有见解了？ - 差不多
不如我们一起抓凶手吧
两代顶尖级新闻人的合作，展露对媒体的热爱
- 怎么样？ - 我喜欢你
你们给我提供一些学校的信息
我会回报，譬如做客你们的俱乐部
- 我们要希尼 - 希尼？
你们认识吧，你们是朋友
这对我们俱乐部很有帮助的
希尼的到访，她是个大明星啊
噢，她是我灵感的源泉
- 那啥时候拍成电影啊？ - 没戏
没什么大伤，休息一下就好了
希尼…长话短说
你获得了接下来三本书的合约
在合约中的空白处，签上你的价钱
等调查结束了，我们就去纽约
- 我已和多家媒体预约了 - 问你一个问题
- 嗯？ - 你看过我的书吗？
- 我在等电影版出来 - 售书结束了
希尼，接受现实吧，你是一个受害者
好好利用这一点，我知道你在意你的读者
你给了他们希望
这些事情让书的销售量大增
更多的人会看到你书，你赚更多的钱 双赢啊
我不需要你了，你被炒了
切
你看过我的书吗？
希尼这个老处女
她今晚会道歉的，等着瞧
我会给她点时间，她会回来的
- 我是瑞贝卡 - 我找希尼，谢谢
我负责她的电话及出席，要留信息吗？
你就是信息
- 你记下来了吗？ - 是的
没听清，我和希尼在医院，你等等
我有时间，你没有
你听上去不在医院啊，你好像在一个停车场
黑暗又绝望的停车场
不过别担心，我会送你去医院的… 太平间！
糟糕
不要！
救命！救命！
杀完就走，你这杀人狂
这是一场有进展的调查
我们已经掌握了一些线索
- 警长 - 我不会讲太多
现在可以提问了
这和最初的伍兹伯勒谋杀案有关吗？
- 亲爱的，等等再说 - 什么？
我们正在全力以赴的调查
我们想通过媒体告诉大家 情况很快可以得到控制
快上楼！快去！大家退后！
封锁住这栋建筑！
- 你发现了什么？ - 什么都没，警长
- 情况被控制住了？ - 你要我说什么好
我虽然不是警察，但我有线索
愿意合作就告诉我
一群菜鸟，让开
剧院俱乐部，不是开会 只是做个自我介绍，欢迎大家
我们是课后活动小组
比欢乐合唱团低一级，比宅男会高两级
大家欢迎我们的嘉宾，希尼·普雷斯科特
忘了那些偶像吧，她就是最大的明星
谢谢，你们把高中的生活做成电影放在网上？
- 对，每个人都可以参与进来 - 唯独杀手找不到
什么意思？
如果想创新，就应该把杀人过程录下来
各种杀人的手法
在被抓到前，上传到网上
让你的作品同你一样不朽
- 不是指我 - 不是指他
那你觉得谁是幕后黑手？
肯定是一个[Stab]迷，想翻拍电影
都是翻拍经典的桥段
但是规则变了，更加出人意料了
开头要像一个音乐录音带，杀人手法要更极端
现代观众已经对原来的套路疲劳了 只有创新才有噱头
在新的规则中，若想从谋杀中活下来
你一定要是同性恋
你怎么能确定杀手是按电影进行的？
- 第一部的结构很明显 - 在父母不在家时，两个孩子被杀
然后校花被残酷杀害
- 接下来是什么？ - 一场聚会
- 对，聚会里面一定会发生凶杀 - 可能会有不和谐的场面
- 今晚有聚会？ - 对，[Stab]马拉松
- [Stab]马拉松？ - 嗯，就是连续播放[stab]系列，每年都举行
- 今晚吗？外面杀手在模仿电影杀人 - 是挺疯狂的
我们得取消聚会
今天是周五，各种聚会汇集
- 聚会在哪里？ - 我们来进入问答环节
- 我需要知道地点 - 这是私人聚会
那你不准备告诉我？我们是个团队啊
- 进入问答环节 - 去你的，我们走
不错
感觉被软禁了
人们常说，我懂你的感受
其实他们不懂
但是我确实懂你的感受
奥莉维亚的死我很难过
还有你的经纪人
- 人们都关注着你，你没有压力吗？ - 有关注我？
我绝对受不了，会毁了我一生
我尽量不想自己，而去关心别人
然后就好了
昨夜你救了我，虽然我们是一家人，但你对我不了解
为什么我没有你那样的勇气做同样的事
我倒希望你不要追究了
有事就叫我
我回卧室了
房间都被钉死了，感觉怪怪的
相信奥莉维亚会体谅的，对吗？
我到聚会了
- 特维尔在这里 - 嗨，柯比
- 他在那干嘛？他不喜欢聚会的 - 可能他以为你会在吧
可能吗！昨晚把我妈都要吓疯了
你就乖乖待着吧，我会帮你喝酒的
- 有什么事就告诉你 - 好，注意安全
[stab]马拉松！
- 谢谢大家 - 嘘
剧院俱乐部欢迎大家的到来，庆祝第三届[stab]系列展
祝大家玩的开心
- 大家准备好了吗？ - 耶！
大家准备被吓死了吗？
- 大家准备好死了吗？ - 不
电影现在开始
给你5秒滚开
老娘回来了！
一切正常，新工作正在进行中，第一章
当我搬到这里来时，从来没想过我会干这样的事
…捉连环杀手…
怎么回事？
- 盖尔，你在哪？ - 我跟踪他们到聚会这儿了
迪伦路四号的一个搁置的旧农场 听着，我弄了监控器，貌似杀手要行动了
- 你确定？ - 确定，杀手在翻拍电影
聚会主题是[Stab]，快过来吧
多难得啊！
- 你说啥？ - 我也不知道，跟他们学的
杜威，听着，你一定要来！
你有凶犯可抓，我有故事可写，双赢啊！
- 呃，你不是要单干吗？ - 你拿我开刷！快来！
- 算了，修好设备，老娘自己行动 - 盖尔！
不错，我很喜欢，其实也不是很喜欢
- 不错 - 嗯
- 她喜欢你 - 是的
不！！！！！！
- 你好 - 你好
- 你是哪位？ - 你觉得是谁？
我都不知道你是谁，讨厌你！
- 你离迪伦路四号多远？ - 5分钟车程
快来
盖尔！小心后面
天哪！
盖尔！
别动！
滚开！你们这些白痴！
妈的！
- 按住伤口 - 抓到他了吗？
- 没，希望你的摄像头拍下来了 - 不只我一人布置了摄像头
- 什么？ - 那里还有一个摄像头
- 他在拍我 - 拍你？
- 他在记录谋杀 - 什么？
他要拍电影！
保护希尼，这太危险了
即使警察巡逻，他们也能得手
- 为什么呢？ - 这是电影规则
- 去他妈的电影里的警察 - 也不是所有的电影里的警察都要阵亡
你若明天就退休，必死
或者家里有个怀孕的老婆，你必死
或者有个比你牛逼的搭档，你也必死
看来我死在第三种情况了
我去侦查一下，我会回来的
唉
- 你真不该说刚才的话 - 规则十年一换
这些天，估计你回来后会发现我的器官都不到位了
- 天哪 - 我去吧
- 嘿，小心点 - 我会的
他死定了…
你上次看的时候这个窗户是开着的吗？快回答
帕金斯？
- 你去死吧 - 你该看看你的表情，哈哈
搞什么啊！
我日
完了
- 抱歉，风铃在这儿 - 我本想修好的，抱歉
- 我刚刚去了商店 - 购物了？
还有些东西在车里，我去取
吉尔，接下电话
- 这里是罗伯茨家 - 你又活下来了，希尼
你只会苟且偷生，我来问你一个问题
你周围的人都死了，光你活了下来，你好受吗？
- 你是谁？ - 看六频道
- 你他妈是谁？ - 打开电视，看看那些受害人
警长的妻子盖尔今晚被袭击，现在命悬一线 凶手行凶后逃逸…
还好你回家了，希尼
- 你为什么要这么做 - 这才是朋友，要是亲人死了更难受吧
- 什么意思？ - 你最在乎的人是谁？
- 你最亲的人 - 你敢！
你救不了她的，只能看着她死
吉尔！
吉尔：我妈快把我逼疯了，快来接我 柯比：这就来
- 凯特！ - 希尼？
- 她不在房里 - 天哪
- 她和柯比出去了，快把她叫回来 - 好
- 快接啊 - 请留言
- 她不接电话 - 杀手威胁说要在杀我之前杀了她
- 噢，我的天哪 - 去找警察
- 警察不在 - 什么？
- 刚刚还在的 - 我们去柯比家
去前面
顶住下面，能做到吗？
快走
凯特，快走！
- 告诉吉尔我很抱歉 - 别…
凯特…
- 副警长，你在这干嘛？ - 我刚刚见有人在周围游荡
那俩警察呢？联系不到他们啊
- 这是谁的血 - 凯特的，我们刚被攻击，她死了
- 她在哪？ - 前门
- 带路 - 好
- 待在这儿 - 好
我是副警长，罗伯茨的家中发生了凶杀案 咱们的巡视警察也不见了
- 收到，我们来追踪 - 节哀吧
你会没事的，我永远和你在一起
慢点
- 杜威？ - 怎么？
- 答应我一件事 - 任何事
- 抓住凶手 - 当然，我爱你
我也爱你
- 聚会一片混乱 - 真不敢相信
警长的老婆死了，他让我们取消 我们没听，现在怎么办？
罗比，放松
凶手在拍电影 用聚会杀人来做结尾
- 伍兹伯勒谋杀案以聚会结尾 - 这不是结尾，是新规则
- 对 - 现在我们来看[Stab7]
- 好… - 没人可以扰乱我的电影节
- 我不想看那个，奥莉维亚被害不久… - 来吧，她最喜欢了
- 柯比，收藏很多经典啊 - 嗯呢
- [阴风阵阵]，[威尼斯疑魂] - 想玩问答游戏吗？电影男孩
- 呵，谁是刀疤脸的第一个扮演者？ - 贡纳·汉森
你感觉到了吗？
- 我们之间在放电 - 那是因为我太强大
真性感…
真不敢相信，你们玩起问答了
外面还有一堆警察在找我们 他们会关了我的网站的！
- 我们完了 - 对
- 天哪，你从哪冒出来的？ - 前门，对了，柯比，发生了这么多事…
- 你应该锁好门 - 我的错
- 呃… 你在这做毛？ - 参加会后小聚
- 谁邀请你来的？ - 吉尔邀请我了
- 发生什么了？ - 什么邀请？
你给我发了条信息 呃…我意思是从你手机上来的
我的手机？噢，我的手机呢？
我想大概是落你车上了，我没给他发短信
我没邀请你！我会证明！
好吧，查理，罗比， 从犯的感觉如何？
- 天哪，真是警长的妻子？ - 我死定了
那么是谁拿吉尔的手机给我发的短信？
- 我们怎么知道你在说实话？ - 你的手机不是丢了吗？
- 买了个新的 - 真的？很快嘛
- 杜威，是我 - 怎么了
- 凯特·罗伯茨死了 - 啊？
- 希尼也不见了 - 凯特怎么死的？
- 被刺死了，跟其他人一样 - 吉尔呢？
- 她也不见了 - 俩巡视警察是干什么吃的？！
他俩在两个街区外的车里，身上很多刀伤
- 好，我马上到 - 是！
查理，想挨我坐吗？
好…大家准备看一些劲爆的吧， 今晚，查理·沃特
对，我搭档查理·沃特，要被上了
我不能公布具体的地址，但是有你们看的
我们高中要发生一段风流史了
谁？
谁在那里？
吓死我了！
- 嗨，查理？ - 嗯？
打扰你了，我知道你在看电影
但是你现在应该有点动作了
- 我该行动了？ - 嗯
- 你先行吗？ - 我刚刚做了
你还是很可爱的 特别是我很孤单，害怕，醉酒的时候
- 呃，你们看到吉尔了吗？ - 嗯，她在楼上
噢，找都找不到还说什么保护
噢，我最喜欢这段了
当你安心在家时
鬼脸出现了… 哗！
- 我打扰什么了吗？ 闭上你的臭嘴… - 是谁请你来的！
肯定不是你
- 我上楼去了 - 滚出去
呃，我有点醉，镜头不稳不是网络的原因
我们来看看查理吧，或者特维尔和吉尔
伍兹伯勒高中有如此多的故事
噢
这样好多了
啊，你不能杀我，违规了！
我是基佬！我意思是，要是这个奏效的话…
柯比，我手机在你房间
里面没短信，特维尔在骗人
- 他现在在哪？ - 他刚刚上去找你了啊
- 他没有 - 特维尔！查理！罗比！
他们可能在外面
- 对不起，我走前没有告诉你们… - 没关系，你得跟我走…
快跑！
罗比！
走！
希尼！
跟上
- 去阳台 - 没别的路了？
- 我们跳下去？ - 两层呢，你手机呢？藏到床下去
- 什么？ - 快去，躲床下面去，别出声
- 相信我，快点！ - 好
没事吧，吉尔，快跑！
- 喂？ - 杜威！
- 希尼，你在哪？ - 柯比家，杀手在这里，快来！
- 我马上来 - 好
希尼！
- 所有人去柯比家 - 全体听好！去柯比家
是我，我去报警了， 但有人把电话切断了
- 我已经报警了 - 吉尔在哪？
快跑！跑！
去地下室，是安全的
- 我听到你叫吉尔的名字，她跑了吗？ - 我估计她没事
- 柯比，让我进来 - 查理…
不，这是罗比的血！求你了
- 求你了，杀手在外面，让我进去 - 如果你不信任他，就别开
- 天哪，让我进来 - 离门远一点，查理
- 柯比，是我啊，让我进来 - 查理！离门远一点
- 是我啊 - 对不起，我…
- 你怎么这样！ - 对不起…
当心后面！
不！
柯比！
天哪，放了他，求你了
放了他！
查理的电话
告诉希尼，今晚要她人头落地
这一切都是因为她
- 她马上就要死了，很快！ - 是杀手
好，我去找吉尔，她应该还在那儿
拖延他时间的，我一会儿就回来
- 让他走，求你了 - 听说你喜欢看恐怖片
柯比，你比他还喜欢吗？
- 忘掉[stab]吧，因为你现在就可以体验了 - 不，他是专家，不是我
- 第一个问题：杰森的武器是什么？ - 大砍刀
杰森:[黑色星期五]里的杀手
- 你还很了解嘛，麦克梅尔呢？ - 呃…屠刀
麦克梅尔:[万圣节]里的杀手
- 皮脸呢？ - 电锯… 放了他吧
- 不知道就问希尼，佛莱迪·库格呢？ - 呃… 剃刀
佛莱迪·库格：[猛鬼街]里的杀手
下面哪个电影令血腥流行， [万圣节][德州电锯杀人狂][魔屋]还是[惊魂记]
- [惊魂记] - 错，无答案，应该是迈克尔·鲍威尔1960执导的[偷窥狂]
- 第一部将观众带入杀手视角的电影是？ - 等等，求你
- 换个问题，求你了 - 好的，柯比，抓住机会了哦
说出一个翻拍的电影…
[万圣节] [德州电锯杀人狂][活死人黎明]
[隔山有眼][鬼哭神嚎][魔屋]
[黑色星期五][猛鬼街][我的血腥情人节]
[陌生来电][灯红酒绿杀人夜][绝命圣诞夜]
[恐怖蜡像馆][迷雾][鬼雾][食人鱼] 其中的一个，对吗？对吗？
我答对了！
吉尔？
- 我赢了，查理 - 太好了…
- 马上好，坚持住 - 柯比？我行动了
做了四年的同学 你才注意到我？
你这呆婊子，太晚了！
嘘… 慢慢的死吧
- 不会像电影中那样爽快的，亲爱的 - 查理…
柯比？
你看了那么多电影，学到了很多
几次都杀不死你
- 吉尔在哪？ - 你觉得她跑的掉吗？没人逃得掉
- 吉尔？ - 希尼，吃惊吧？
看着，这就是摄像头 现在把它关掉
- 查理？ - 解决掉她
杀罗比的镜头最精彩， 比最初的三个都好
太好了，剪辑好传到网上去 嫁祸给特维尔
说到特维尔…
- 吉尔，求你 - 混蛋，闭嘴！
- 我都是跟你学的 - 你以为你男友很糟糕，希尼？
- 这个人上了我，玩了我，还没有给我名分 - 干什么啊，吉尔，我一直爱你
你给我闭嘴！
吉尔，拿着，保护好自己
放下枪…
- 求你了… - 杀了那么多人，还传到网上，特维尔
- 但是你是为我做的 - 你在说什么？！
我不是你可以背叛的！
- 我们做的很好 - 太完美了
不要，求你了！
准备好了吗？
还没想清楚吗，希尼？当然是翻拍了 特维尔是新一代的杀手
我们都是无辜的受害者，希尼和兰妮
你让全世界都听说了发生的事情 我们让全世界都看到了
全世界都会播放这个，人们都会看到
我会比你还出名
只剩我们两个了，宝贝 你受害者的角色演得不错
我今天表现的太好了，对不对？ 说这么多谎话，人们都相信了
咱骨子里就是这天赋
- 你怎么能这么做？ - 你知道生在这样的家庭是什么感受吗？
都因为你，人们都只知道你
- 你永远都是那么突出，现在该我了！ - 你逃不掉的
- 来吧，查理，勇敢点，别动 - 好，来吧，我准备好了
来吧，来吧！
咱不是这样彩排的…
你自己说的
媒体喜欢只有一个生还者 你和特维尔是同谋
你就是媒体要的人
- 连朋友都杀？ - 朋友？我不要朋友，只要粉丝
你还不懂吗？ 不是为了杀你，而是为了像你一样成名
为此我母亲都得死，就是为了忠实原著
很变态吧？哈，这样才有趣 你在电视上光耀了15分钟，我也要！
你觉得我该做什么？上大学，毕业，工作？ 看看吧，现在是互联网的世界
你觉得怎样才能出名？ 不劳而获，一个变态的故事就足矣
好了希尼，你该死了，这是电影的新规则 只能有一个代表活着，面对吧
你天真的日子，没了
别跟我说你还没准备好
啊！我操！
快进去！
- 全面检查房间！ - 收到
吉尔，跟我们描述一下吧… 当英雄是什么感觉？
- 吉尔，最重要的是你活了下来 - 查理和特维尔都要杀我
- 他们还杀了我妈妈，罗比和柯比 - 别说了，躺下，好好休息
- 你妻子… - 她没事，她很坚强
我将来出书，要她教我 我们的伤处都一样
- 我们活了下来，希望希尼也是 - 吉尔，他们还不确定，情况未知
希尼在抢救，他们说她能活下来
- 什么？我看到特维尔杀了她 - 我也不清楚，她很坚强
- 我想见她 - 她还没醒，可能失忆，你得帮她
你好好休息吧
- 她没事吧 - 嗯，坚强的小孩
- 是的 - 她还问起了你，她让你教她写书
- 你们的伤处都是一样的 - 她肩膀也被刺中了？
- 她是怎么知道的？ - 遭了
你就是死不了，你是谁啊？ 不死小强？我不那么认为
去死吧
缝得结实吗？
希尼！
- 快来希尼的房间支援 - 知道了！
- 希尼？ - 杜威！
结束了吧，希尼， 结尾应该在那栋房子里
当作开放式结尾吧， 你逃不掉的，吉尔
- 当然逃得掉 - 杜威？
希尼
- 放松，杀了我就没人写书了 - 看来我只能自己写了
妈的！
不要开枪否则我杀了杜威
- 你觉得我不会？丢出枪！ - 快扔啊！
你一定要当英雄吗？枪丢过来！
聋了吗？枪丢过来！
- 站起来，手举高！ - 别做蠢事…
用不着你指挥我
- 噢，天哪 - 站起来，贱人！
- 好 - 站起来，快！
- 知道了… - 过来，跟我走！
- 好… - 打爆你的脑袋
- 呃，我可以留遗言吗？ - 什么？说吧
不要
- 准备好了吗？ - 准备好了吗？
好了
你忘了翻拍大忌，别违背原作
- 杜威… - 呃，什么东西打我？
别问了，你没事吧
- 她站在后面 - 老技俩了
- 噢，天哪… - 漂亮
- 你还活着？ - 我有防弹衣
这里有两名警员负伤，一名新疑犯，多名伤者
我们需要医生！
我不知道你，我现在感觉好多了
我们在伍兹伯勒社区医院 第一时间为你播报生还者吉尔·罗伯茨……
…生还者现在成了杀人机器…
…吉尔·罗伯茨，将被全世界所知道…
…凭自己阻止了一场21世纪谋杀…
…伍兹伯勒的吉尔·罗伯茨，是美国的英雄…
谢谢观赏，TLF欢迎你 tlfsubs.eastgame.org